Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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