i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i was born a porn star she said
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize