Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
