He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
You should frame my arrest warrant.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Come on in and take your pants off
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