did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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