Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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