I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Randomize
