So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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