Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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