I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
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