He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
