whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
