ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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