When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
is it fun? or sober?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
