Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
No subtext here. People are naked.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
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