yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
