We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
