Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
