people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
