Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
