So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Randomize
