that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize