hell yes lets make some ravioli
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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