It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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