areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
