Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
