I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
