.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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