I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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