the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
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