you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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