the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
