Dual....:-)
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
