Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
We left the knife in your bed.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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