Already got asked if we're dating
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
