Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
