Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
