Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
