I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
