I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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