Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I would fuck him just for his dog
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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