Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I supernannyed him into submission
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
