bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
