Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
