the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
The adults are the big ones right?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
PANTIES FOUND
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