I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize