Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I think we might need a safe word for this...
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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