you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
