last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
