yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
